This last week was hard for me.
I told an acquaintance of mine that I had a big photo shoot coming up and I was really excited about it. He said, “well, you know they need plus size models.” That stung. After going through my cancer experience I gained 25-30 lbs. Me, the health and fitness queen, the woman that showed up in that tiny bikini and bounced around.
I hadn’t fully healed from surgery and I kept beating myself up. Thoughts like ‘you look horrible’ or ‘your fat ass needs to get to the gym,’ ran rampant through my mind. I kept beating myself up with one more rep and one more pound, only to add more weight and more stress. Here is the thing, every pound you gain on your body is because you told yourself you did something wrong.
How could I heal my body when I hadn’t healed my own mindset? How was I showing up? Maybe my body was just tired and needed to heal. This company hired me to take my pictures and PAY ME and all I was worried about was how I looked. So, I went to the shoot. And I OWNED IT.
I haven’t felt more confident in a LONNNNGGGGG time. I posted the picture on social media and it was my 4th most popular picture I have ever posted (sidenote: I used to be a fitness model with rocking abs and 14% body fat). Imagine with me for a second the CONFIDENCE that built in me.
That woman who showed up for that shoot with extra pounds on her said “yes” that day. You do DESERVE the body of your dreams. The dream body for YOU. Learn to love your body and your body will love you back.